Anger and Its Many Faces
Master your anger 😡 - some tips from a Navy SEAL & a Yoga Dude
"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured." - Mark Twain
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How much do you sit, focus, and get to know the many faces and feelings of your anger? Let us help you unwrap this complex emotion, offering valuable insights and some practical strategies for managing it.
Here's a deeper look into the key takeaways from our latest episode:
Anger: the Emotional Alarm
What if you likened anger to an alarm system, signaling that something is amiss? Your anger is often a "secondary emotion," meaning there is something deeper, a "primary emotion," at play too. This perspective aligns you with the idea that anger often masks deeper emotions such as embarrassment, shame, or hurt. Recognizing these underlying feelings can be the first step in addressing the root cause of anger rather than just its symptoms.
The Three Poisons
The Three Poisons is a Buddhist teaching highlighting greed, hatred, and ignorance as a devastating cocktail of emotions that hinders your personal growth.
Hatred is a great example of the primary (deeper) emotion that might be driving your anger. A first step to actively detox from this emotion involves becoming self-aware of the physical sensations that arise when you are in this emotional state. Where is it located, how does it feel? This is essential to transforming it. Because if you know the feeling, then you can name it, and if you can name it, then you can tame it. If you can tame if then you can change it.
This is why taking time to slow down, sit, and meditate is so powerful!
S.T.O.P. Instead
As you increase in your anger awareness, try this simple and potent tool the next time you are feeling the rise of anger. The S.T.O.P. Method is simple: Stop whatever you are doing, Take a breath (maybe a few are needed), Observe (internal and external situational awareness, and then Proceed with intentions that match your desired outcome.
This is a classic emotional intelligence technique for self-mastery. This method helps create the necessary pause, allowing for a more measured response rather than an impulsive reaction. A regular mindfulness practice like this will enhance emotional regulation and reduce the frequency and intensity of angry outbursts.
Healthy Anger: Myth or Reality? 🤔
Yes, anger can be healthy at times and act as an alarm in a life-affirming way.
Anger at times might be just what is needed to show you that something is off or misaligned. Anger in these circumstances might help you to course correct towards positive change.
For instance, anger can drive social justice movements or personal advocacy. The key is to manage anger constructively, avoiding destructive expressions like rage.
What if you S.T.O.P. and ask: "What is this anger trying to tell me?"
Practical Techniques for Anger Management
Breathing Exercises: Exercising daily practices like Box Breathing will help create awareness, calm your nervous system, and help break the cycle of automatic anger responses.
Grounding Exercises: Getting back to nature and engaging your five senses will help anchor you in the present moment and provide the stability required to control the outrage.
Reflection: Revisiting triggering situations in a controlled manner can offer new insights and help develop healthier responses.
You can transform anger from a destructive force into a constructive one. It takes time, practice, and patience. For a more comprehensive understanding and practical tips, listen to the full episode of ➡️ The Many Faces of Anger from MTM.
Stay mindful and keep spreading those good vibes!
Thank you,
Will & Jon, coHost of MTM
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